“You want us to do what?!” said Callie. “Let’s travel the world. I’d like to start with Thailand” Andrew cautiously replied. Callie just gazed at Andrew with a look of disbelief. In hopes of getting a positive reaction from Callie, Andrew pulled up pictures of Thailand’s beaches and jungles on his laptop. “See how beautiful this is? It’s so cheap to stay in Thailand. I found a place in Phuket right on the beach.” said Andrew with a bit more confidence. “Andrew, Thailand has to be dangerous” Callie said. Andrew immediately interjected “Actually Thailand is one of the more popular travel destinations. It’s quite safe from what I’ve seen. We could go snorkeling, sit on the beach, and explore with kayaks. Doesn’t that sound fun?” Callie thought for a moment before giving her reply, “you like doing those things and I like doing them sometimes but there are other things I’d like to do.” “Like what?” Andrew quickly asked? “Oh I don’t know” said Callie. At that point Andrew had hit a brick wall. He had wanted to travel all his life. Now that he found the love of his life he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. It seemed like nothing he said would convince his girlfriend to live a life of adventure. All he could do was suggest where they should go eat for dinner.
The next day while working a shift as a resident assistant at his university, Andrew began to really complain. “Why can’t we go where I want? There is nothing wrong with us going to Thailand. Doesn’t she know how bad I want to travel? What is wrong with me getting out of here for a while?” Then Andrew noticed a pattern in his thinking. Almost everything was me and I. Even when he used we, it still came from a selfish place. That moment he knew what was wrong. Later that day Callie came to visit Andrew while he was working. “How is work?” Asked Callie. “it’s fine I suppose. Say Callie let me ask you a question. If you could go anywhere in the world where would you want to go?” Callie excitedly replied, “I’ve always wanted to go to Italy.” By now Andrew had a huge smile on his face. “Let’s go then” said Andrew. “Really?” Callie replied in disbelief. “For sure. We’ll find places to go, things to do, and we can stay as long as you like.” Callie became almost flattered that Andrew would consider her destination without question. For the rest of the day the couple looked up Italian destinations, restaurants, hotels, and everything else that allowed them to set a goal. Andrew learned two very important lessons that day. First, put your partner before yourself. Second, it’s not where you go but who you go with that matters.